If the world seems more griefy than it once did, you’re not wrong – grief is everywhere. We’re reading, writing, and googling on the topic more than ever. The use of the word “grief” in English-language books has nearly tripled since 1920, and we’re googling “grief” far more than before — a whopping 122% more than just five years ago. According to United States data from Google Trends, the search term remained relatively flat between 2004 and 2015 but began to climb in late 2016, accelerating sharply in 2020 and spiking in 2023. While the peak has dipped, overall interest remains significantly higher than at any point in the past two decades, marking an ongoing cultural shift. Sure, it’s easy to pinpoint the COVID-19 pandemic as the catalyst for the 2020 spike, but five years later, grief is still trending – and not just in books or search engines.
Grief-centered social media accounts and grief-related hashtags are magnifying the topic and galvanizing a growing global audience. TikTok Ads Creative Center reports nearly 3 billion views of #GriefTok, with #grief amassing over 27.1 billion views in the past 30 days alone! But we aren’t just scrolling grief on our phones; we’re listening, too. More than 100 global podcasts are dedicated to grief, with countless more naming it as a subtopic. In 2023, grief even got its own magazine—an entire 100-page, full-color print publication. While the age-old experience of grief is far from a hip new thing, these modern mediums are attracting a broad, intergenerational audience, but who is behind the movement and seemingly safeguarding #grief as #trending?
(Gen) X Marks the Spot
As a proud Gen Xer, I’m the first to acknowledge my cohort’s numerous contributions to the collective grief space, in our roles as clinicians, authors, educators, podcast hosts, content creators, and more. Regardless of the professional title assumed as adults, I imagine us as teens, watching our parents and other Baby Boomers ignore, dismiss, or sweep grief under the rug and saying, “Yeah…no.”
Granted, given the lived experiences of our parents and grandparents (devastating wars, economic depression, and decades of hardship), it may be understandable why Boomers and the Greatest Generation weren’t interested in “examining” their grief. Nonetheless, Gen X dove in, doing it ourselves, unsupervised, and without fanfare — like the Goonies we are.
As a result, many significant advancements in the field are credited to Gen X (duh). But my beloved contingent can’t lay claim to today’s seismic grief shift.
Not that we’re trying.
Sure, Gen X may pride itself on quietly figuring things out on our own, sans fanfare—but when it comes to the exponential amplification of grief, it’s hard to ignore the impact of those behind us on the generational timeline (as if they’d allow it).
Millennials have brought their generational gifts to the table—and true to form, the fanfare too.
Grief, But Make It Functional
Whether you prefer the term “Generation Y” or “Millennials,” the team born between 1981 and 1996 is not only changing how we work, but they’re also disrupting traditional systems, including how we grieve. Millennials catch a fair share of criticism and are often portrayed by others as entitled, overly sensitive, and dependent on technology. While these may be undesirable for some, say, traditional employers leading conventional work structures, through the lens of grief education and advocacy, these “shortcomings” become superpowers:
- “Entitled” = An unwillingness to accept broken systems
- “Overly-sensitive” = Emotionally attuned
- “Technology Dependent” = Digital fluency
In leveraging these superpowers, millennials are introducing new resources, amplifying grief narratives, and fostering communities — not just across digital platforms but IRL.
For Chicagoland Millennial Kera Sanchez, technology is a tool she credits for helping her navigate the unexpected death of her mother just days after the birth of her daughter in 2022. “It felt like being thrown into the deep end of grief and postpartum—with no floaties,” she recalls. “I was looking for something to make me feel alive again…something to pull me back into life, and many of the (social media) accounts I found early on were soft around the edges,” Sanchez says, “I didn’t see many people weaving grief into the boldness of life.”
So, Sanchez created a platform that did: Get Griefy. A digital community and quarterly print magazine, she calls “raw, relatable, and digestible.” Now in her second year as Editor-in-Chief, Sanchez says the publication, filled with vivid color and dark humor, aspires to be equal parts digital zine (whatever that is), community hub, and emotional lifeline. Based on its devoted audience and growing subscriber base, Get Griefy is achieving success.
Resilience, But Make It Healing
If there’s a Gen X-Millennial Venn diagram, resilience is sure to be among the shared characteristics of the “apathetic” and “entitled.” For those working in the grief space, resilience is practically a prerequisite. Canadian-based Grief and Resilience Coach and Founder of the Global Resilience Project, Blair Kaplan Venables, agrees. “Grief and resilience go hand in hand, and we need to begin to reclaim what it means to be resilient.” Kaplan Venables endured an agonizing chain of grief in early adulthood: her husband nearly died, her father-in-law died, a miscarriage followed, and both of her parents died—all in the same year. Kaplan Venables explained, “When life knocked me down again and again, I chose to get back up. Not because it was easy, but because it was necessary.” Today, Kaplan Venables talks openly about her experiences with loss, death, and grief on her popular podcast, Resilient A.F., and sees her large millennial audience embracing vulnerability in ways that weren’t necessarily modeled. “We are more comfortable admitting when we are sad and not okay…we are leaning into ‘calling in griefy’ to work and events.”
[Cut to Millennials rejecting the ways of Gen X, much like we did Boomers: “Hard pass, Gen X.” “Thanks, but no thanks.”]
Wanna Join?
It’s evident that Millennials aren’t just examining their grief; they’re openly, unabashedly offering it up for discussion. Critics may cite this as an example of “complaining,” but others, including Sanchez, say it’s “advocacy.” Given the public nature of these conversations, I agree. With every article, interview, publication, and podcast, Millennials aren’t just talking about grief but presenting it — like artwork on exhibit for the rest of us to consider. In this way, they are inclusively reshaping our grief culture and inviting us to (as they say) “tag along.”
I’m in – and I’m not done. Gen X is analog and digital – that means we’re an adaptable bunch, so don’t dismiss us just yet!
Adapt and Advance Together
Though the first of us is approaching retirement age, the last of our squad has another fifteen years, plenty of time to flex our adaptability and advance in our fields. For me, this means continuing to learn, staying curious, and asking deeply investigative questions (up first: what is a “zine”?). Through conversations with my Millennial counterparts, I’ve gained insight into myself and gained clarity on the unique strengths of my generation. For example:
- We don’t expect help, but that doesn’t mean we can’t offer it.
- We’re hyper-independent, but that doesn’t mean we don’t value teamwork.
- We’re proud to be the last of those with a tech-free childhood, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t embrace the power of technology and use it for good.
- We’re skeptical and sarcastic.
The Millennials’ influence on this new, griefy era is evident, and I’m not only glad for it, I’m also excited for continued collaborations. If you’re a Gen Xer – I suspect you are, too. Because, as all Goonies know, the path of life is full of booby traps, but the chances of finding treasure are best when we search together. Or not. Whatever.
