When We Feel Lonely Even When We Are Not Alone

When We Feel Lonely Even When We Are Not Alone

Loneliness is not just about being alone. It is about feeling unseen. It is the quiet ache that surfaces when we are surrounded by people but still feel disconnected from ourselves. Emotional... Read more »
When the Self Rifts—and How It Repairs

When the Self Rifts—and How It Repairs

* Task-self and pain-self are terms I used here, and are not standard. American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed., text rev.). Barr, N., Atuel, H.,... Read more »
3 Reasons Why Therapists Might Support Family Estrangement

3 Reasons Why Therapists Might Support Family Estrangement

Why would a qualified, ethical therapist support their client’s decision to estrange from their family? Aren’t families sacred relationships that must be preserved at all costs? Not always. In fact, family estrangement... Read more »
Why Your Brain Keeps Leaving the Conversation

Why Your Brain Keeps Leaving the Conversation

One night recently, I “left” my kitchen while still standing in it. My wife was telling me about some family vexations she’d happened upon during the day. As soon as I heard... Read more »
Making and Protecting Friendships in Uncertain Times

Making and Protecting Friendships in Uncertain Times

You probably have seen articles about how important friendships are for our psychological, emotional, and physical health. Friends help us celebrate good times, but they are especially important when times are tough.... Read more »
The Gentleman’s Code of Connection

The Gentleman’s Code of Connection

For the better part of five years, I’ve been going to a shooting retreat in the foothills near Yosemite to improve my skills and have a bit of fun. These retreats or... Read more »
I Used to Drink to Calm My Anxiety—Here’s What I Wish I Knew

I Used to Drink to Calm My Anxiety—Here’s What I Wish I Knew

As the cold beer ran down my throat, the sharpness of my self-conscious thoughts started to lose its edge. The conversation started to flow, and the laughter became easier. The first time... Read more »
World-Renowned DJ Hardwell on Mental Performance

World-Renowned DJ Hardwell on Mental Performance

Robbert van de Corput, a world-renowned DJ professionally known as Hardwell, has been performing in front of large crowds across the world for over a decade. But for Hardwell, it’s not about... Read more »
The Extreme Fear and Pain of Being Criticized

The Extreme Fear and Pain of Being Criticized

Some spend their entire lives defending themselves against punishment and shame, seeing it lurking everywhere. Those with a tendency to engage in black and white thinking tend to either feel threatened and... Read more »
A New Path to Well-Being

A New Path to Well-Being

Imagine you’re stuck indoors, the city outside a grey blur, and the stresses of daily life have left your mind feeling like a tangled mess. Traditional wisdom suggests a walk in the... Read more »
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