Children hold insights and wisdom in important parts of life that adults often lose, forget, or have to put aside in the service of other adulting tasks. Kids are often better at being fully immersed in a moment, from watching an anthill to building pillow forts for hours. Excitement and joy are often evident in their whole body, witnessed in the wiggling, jumping, or bubbling-over excitement. They are often much less inhibited about their thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, having not yet fully developed the sense of self-consciousness or societal expectations. Children who are able to live in safe, secure, and stable homes have the benefit of being more genuine and authentic in daily living.
Kids are able to have more freedom, due to the fact that children don’t need to think about what’s for dinner or how to pay bills. They are hopefully sheltered from adult hardships while simultaneously being given increasing responsibilities and knowledge about the grown-up world. This allows the potential for more child-like wonder about the world while simultaneously learning and growing to incorporate more grown-up skills.
There are many things we can learn from children or gain from being with them wholeheartedly in the moment, but there is also wisdom from some of the traditional elementary school structures that could also benefit adults. There are three parts of a 5th grader’s school day utilized here as metaphors for adults looking to be wiser, healthier, and mentally well.
Leaning Into Learning, Like With Sex Ed
Most children in traditional American schools are taught about sex ed around 5th grade. Some schools and parents may begin introducing part of this topic sooner, and many teenagers are provided more extensive information later in their schooling, but the 10-year-old, mostly pre-pubertal, maturing 5th graders are the target age for opening conversations about the birds and the bees for many.
Unlike the learning of fractions or geography, many children being introduced to sex ed find this area to be much more interesting and exciting. The children may present in a range of ways, from embarrassed to wise-cracking, but almost all are interested. Even those children who look shocked or solemn-faced also generally have an underlying eagerness to better understand an educational domain that is taboo in some families, misunderstood in so much of our culture, and given much more limited exposure than is warranted. The interest in information about anatomy, body changes, and human reproduction tends to spark more interest than most any other subject domain.
Hopefully, adults have the sexuality education they need or know where to go to find reputable answers for remaining questions, but the metaphor here relates to finding hobbies and interests in our life which can similarly elicit our interest and excitement. Yes, many adult responsibilities consume our time and energy, just as children do have to pass English and Math; however, making time to get curious, engrossed, and absorbed about special topics is part of what can add joy and interest to life.
Reflection questions: Is there a skill or a hobby you have often thought about pursuing? In what domain might you get lost in fascinating exploration to learn something new?
The Value of Lunchroom Time
Ask most kids about their favorite part of their school day, and the vast majority will say “lunch.” Because breakfast for many schoolchildren can be limited, many hours ago, or even sometimes non-existent, lunchtime is key. We know that nutrition is essential for energy and learning, but the socialization opportunities also have benefits. Unlike the time spent reading or writing, lunch can be a time to refuel, relax, and laugh.
The importance of stopping to eat and enjoy some social engagement time in our adult day can be meaningful as well. We may or may not trade snacks or share our dessert, but making time to pause, enjoy some nourishment, and maybe share some pleasantries with others in our vicinity can be day-changing. Communal meals and breaking bread with others have significance. While we generally don’t start food fights nor hopefully won’t exclude others from sitting with us, we may still sometimes have awkwardness about being with others for meals or taking the risk to invite someone to dine with us; however, everyone needs to eat and so a time-limited meal invitation can sometimes be an ideal way to get to know someone or catch up.
Reflection Questions: Are you eating mid-day to keep up your energy and concentration? Do you have opportunities to, at least sometimes, connect with other humans in a shared eating activity?
The Benefit of Recess
The benefits of daily breaks and movement have been well-established, and this is why most schools incorporate recess as part of the daily school-day routine. Kids and teachers alike can attest to this being so valuable and necessary. There has also been behavioral management innovation towards no longer consequencing a child for misbehavior or work incompletion by taking away recess, something that was quite common in past decades, as this has been found to often worsen rather than improve the child’s behavior.
Adult recess is something that could have much value in most anyone’s life. We may or may not want to play kickball, swing on swings, or create masterpieces with sidewalk chalk, but the notion of getting outside and being carefree for at least a part of each day whenever possible has inherent wisdom. Taking a break from work or household tasks, even briefly, acts as a reset. And the value of being outdoors to take in the multisensorial benefits is well supported in science.
Reflection Questions: Are you taking breaks at regular intervals in your day? Can you make time for play or for some once-loved childhood activities? Do you have a way you love connecting with nature?
