You are scrolling on your phone after a particularly stressful day when the ads start gliding by. The world’s softest pair of sweatpants, and they are on sale! A set of kettle bells that glow in the dark for your next disco workout. A slick, glossy polish that supposedly won’t wreck your nails (and if you buy three sets you won’t have to pay for shipping). After just a few taps, the items are in your cart, ready for check out.
Impulsive Versus Compulsive Spending
The urge to buy sometimes comes on so suddenly and strongly that it feels nearly impossible to resist. Some researchers make the distinction between impulsive versus compulsive spending. Impulsive spending is defined as spontaneous and emotionally driven, while compulsive spending is defined as more chronic in nature and leading to significant distress. Both, however, involve difficulties with self-regulation and can lead to lower well-being and financial hardship.
Risk Factors for Purchasing on a Whim
Compulsive buying has been increasing in prevalence over recent decades. Certain individuals seem to be more susceptible, including younger adults and individuals with difficulty problem solving, planning, and resisting distractions. One study found that adverse childhood experiences–such as experiencing abuse or neglect–were associated with emotion regulation problems and anxiety, each of which were also associated with impulsive spending. Another study similarly found that emotion dysregulation and impulsivity accounted for a relationship between childhood trauma and impulsive spending.
Although anyone can struggle with making purchases that are not thoroughly considered, certain mental health diagnoses are associated with impulsive spending. Research suggests that individuals with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are more susceptible to making impulsive purchases and having trouble delaying gratification, and impulsive or uncontrollable spending is included in the diagnostic criteria for bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder.
Strategies for Curbing Impulsive Spending
If you are struggling with impulse purchases, try these six strategies from dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) to prevent buyer’s remorse:
- Reflect on what led to a past impulsive purchase. Completing a chain analysis on a past impulsive purchase can help you come to a deeper understanding of what led to a seemingly out-of-the blue decision. Think back to the prompting event for the purchase. This could have been merchandise-related, like seeing an Instagram posting from an influencer who looked great in what they were wearing. But it could also be an emotionally charged event, like a fight with a loved one that left you feeling unsettled and sent you towards retail therapy. It can also be helpful to reflect on vulnerability factors that preceded the prompting event and made you more susceptible to the purchase, like recently getting your paycheck or feeling emotionally drained from a tough week. After you have identified a prompting event and vulnerability factors, write out everything that happened between the prompting event and making a purchase, whether that was an action you took, a thought that went through your mind, or an emotion that you felt. For example, did you check to see whether Afterpay was available (action)? Did you imagine yourself showing up to work in that new outfit (thought)? Did you feel a rush of pleasure at the idea of how good you would look (emotion)? Each of the steps in the chain towards clicking “purchase” is an opportunity to intervene and prevent an impulsive buy in the future.
- Write out the short- and long-term consequences of your last impulsive purchase. Short-term consequences can be positive or negative, like enjoying the anticipation of waiting for the package to arrive, a further spark of joy when unboxing the item, or feeling guilty that you didn’t save anything from this month’s paycheck. Long-term consequences may be primarily negative with an impulsive purchase, like the cheap sweater eventually pilling so much that you stop wearing it, the headphones getting replaced by a newer model and ending up in a landfill, or a purchase contributing to growing credit card debt.
- Write out the pros and cons before making a purchase. Once you have clicked “add to cart” (or have literally put an item in your real-life shopping cart), but before you enter your credit card details or fork over cash, write out a list of pros and cons for buying the item. Yes, that is going to be cumbersome. However, it will slow down your process of making the purchase and force you to deliberately weigh the decision.
- Reflect on whether you are trying to avoid a particular emotion. We often seek quick happiness because we are trying to escape another feeling: disappointment, boredom, anxiety, or despair. A purchase isn’t going to fix that emotion, we are ultimately just delaying it. Consider mindfully allowing yourself to experience the emotion, even just for a few minutes, before deciding whether or not to make the purchase.
- Use another way to self-soothe. Sometimes an emotion is so strong that we need a way to soothe ourselves. Luckily, shopping is not the only option. Our five senses can each be a helpful portal to self-soothing, particularly when used in combination. For example, tidy your favorite corner of the house and sit there under pleasant lamplight (sight). Put on music that speaks to your soul, whether that is jazz, bluegrass, classical, or lo-fi (sound). Make yourself mint tea or slice some fresh fruit (taste), light fragrant candles (smell), and slip into soft, dryer-warm pajamas (touch).
- Accept reality as it is. Effective advertising persuades us that we can escape reality and discover a new version of ourselves. This is what makes purchases so alluring — we can’t help but want those new glasses when we think about the type of person we will be while wearing them. The best way to combat this mirage? Accepting reality, which means accepting ourselves and our lives as we are currently living them. Accepting reality doesn’t mean we can’t change it. But the kind of change we are seeking doesn’t usually come through one more purchase.
