When we’re in a good season and life is going well for us, ask most of us what we’re grateful for, and the answers could likely come quickly. We might start by naming the things we know we appreciate… I’m grateful for my family, my health, my home, my work. Yet sometimes, we say it, we think it, and we keep it all above the shoulders. My gentle invitation is to go a little deeper to truly feel it. This matters even more when life feels hard or heavy.
Why Gratitude Matters
The research talks about how gratitude changes us psychologically, emotionally, physiologically, and even spiritually. Gratitude can help calm the nervous system and ease stress while shifting our attention away from negative thought patterns and into the present moment. Research even suggests that gratitude may help lessen symptoms of depression, improve sleep quality, and contribute to a greater overall sense of well-being. In my work, I have also seen that when people make space for gratitude, they are more likely to help others and follow through with the wellness behaviours that support them.
Experiencing and expressing gratitude regularly, even in small doses, can promote a lasting, appreciative perspective on life (Bohlmeijer et al., 2021). Through life’s storms and challenges, it can help keep us connected to what is still steady and good, and as with most things, practice makes better.
The Scarcity Lens
Gratitude has a lot to do with perspective. It is a choice that helps us focus on the positive aspects of our lives.
When we’re caught in a scarcity mindset, it can become the lens through which we see everything. Not enough time. Not enough opportunities. Not enough money. Not enough recognition. If someone believes there aren’t enough opportunities, they will move through the world looking for evidence that it’s true. The opportunities may be there, but they may not be primed to notice them. Gratitude helps shift our attention toward what is here and what we do have, moving us toward a greater sense of sufficiency, and even abundance. It’s what can help us start to see that we do have enough resources to meet the moment, there is spaciousness in my day, and I do have the right people in my corner.
Gratitude doesn’t erase hardship or difficult emotions, and it doesn’t mean we need to search for a silver lining. What it can do is strengthen the body’s capacity to take in and hold onto the good. This matters especially when we’re feeling unsteady, exhausted, or dysregulated.
5 Ways to Feel Your Gratitude, Not Just Think It
- Drop into your body: Gratitude can be an emotional experience when we let ourselves really settle into it. The next time you name something you’re grateful for, pause. Picture the person, the moment, or the experience and really feel into the feeling associated with what you are expressing thanks for. Recall the unexpected expression of love, the phone call, the favour you didn’t see coming, or the memory that still makes you smile.
- Look for what is here, especially where it feels scarce: When you catch yourself thinking “not enough,” take a moment to notice what is here and what you do have in that moment. If you’re feeling like there’s not enough time, perhaps you have a quiet 20 minutes before dinner. Or if you’re feeling like there’s not enough support, maybe there is one person who would answer if you reached out. Practicing gratitude in the opposite direction of where we’re feeling scarcity can be what helps widen the lens.
- Savour the micro moments: Let yourself sit with the appreciation of the little things, like being fully present with a hot cup of coffee. I still find it fascinating that we will spend 20 minutes looking for a show to watch, but many of us struggle to find the time to reflect and count our blessings! Try stacking a pause onto something you already do every day, such as making your coffee, brushing your teeth, or waiting for the kettle. That daily habit is a built-in reminder to notice the small things. Over time, it builds trust that moments of goodness and relief will keep showing up, and that we can lean into them.
- Try imagining without: Think about something you count on every day, like hot water in the shower, a reliable car, or that video call with your child when they’re away at school. Imagine what it would feel like not to have it, and then come back to the reality that you do. The everyday gifts, conveniences, and connections we sometimes overlook tend to light up when we picture their absence.
- Remember what you once wished for: On any given day, I recognize that my life is made up of things I once prayed for. When I am deeply present in this place of gratitude, it can bring me to my knees. How much of your life today is made up of things you once wished for and worked for? Blessings hit harder when you remember what you went through to experience them.
Final Thoughts
Gratitude can set the soul ablaze and bring us into a deeper appreciation for the little things that aren’t so little after all.
By intentionally building and fostering gratitude practices, they eventually become part of who we are, how we show up, and how we see the world. Before the day gets busy, even saying, “Thank you for this new day,” can change how we meet the day ahead. Perhaps by slowing down enough to really appreciate the moments and gifts, we can remember just how precious this big, beautiful life can be.
