What is “willpower”? Why is it so difficult to overcome certain problems or attain one’s personal goals through the assertion of willpower? What makes it so challenging, for instance, to lose weight, stop procrastinating, or quit drinking or using drugs, despite our best efforts? Or to exercise regularly, meditate, eat better, or get sufficient sleep—despite knowing that doing such things would be in our best interest? We try repeatedly to succeed in such efforts, with the best intentions, but inevitably seem to either fall short or fail. As St. Paul the Apostle laments, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”
What goes wrong? What happens to our so-called willpower? Willpower is commonly defined by the dictionary as the ability to control one’s own actions, emotions, thoughts, impulses, or urges and refers to the “strength of one’s will, especially in the exercise of self-control.” When we are unsuccessful in such efforts, we typically attribute this failure to an absence of willpower. We also tend to attribute such apparent weakness to a lack of moral fiber, will, inner strength, or self-discipline. We tend to blame ourselves and feel guilty for this perceived weakness, which gradually erodes our self-esteem, integrity, and sense of agency. But, in fact, it is a far more profound phenomenon, caused by the inner conflict between our intentions and intentionality. The real underlying problem is that we are not of one mind on these matters. We are a house divided.
Will vs. Willpower
As previously discussed (see my prior post), the concept and experiential discovery of one’s will is central to successful psychotherapy of any sort. But, when used in this sense, “will” is something different from what we commonly mean by “willpower.” Otto Rank understood that the human will cannot not be expressed in some form or another, is communicated either constructively or destructively, positively or negatively, and that when it cannot be expressed productively or creatively, it becomes neurotic or psychotic, manifesting itself destructively or negatively in the form of what Rank (1936) called “counter-will.” So, what is this Rankian notion of will? And how is it different from what we call willpower?
As described by one of Rank’s biographers, psychiatrist E.J. Lieberman (1993), “Will represents the life center of the human being, something primal and ultimate.” Another biographer, Jessie Taft (1958), writes, “Will is not merely the drive of a predominant instinct or combination of instincts; it is that central integration [and expression] of the forces of the individual which exceeds the sum of the parts.”
So-called willpower is an expression of what we believe to be our will or true intentions; but, in reality, it typically stems solely from what the ego, persona, or conscious personality desires, because this, for most of us, is the part of ourselves with which we most strongly identify. But our willpower tends to be sabotaged by what we do not know, or want to know, about ourselves, i.e., the unconscious. This is what undermines and renders willpower weak, impotent, and frequently ineffective.
Rank’s ( 1936) “Will Therapy,” in some ways a precursor to today’s existential therapy, sought to cultivate in the patient or client the capacity to express their will, rather than mere willpower, constructively and creatively in the world. But how is this actually accomplished?
Intentions vs. Intentionality
One way of thinking about this exceedingly common conundrum regarding willpower is to differentiate between one’s intentions and intentionality. Intentions consist of what we more or less consciously want or choose to do, whereas intentionality includes both our conscious and unconscious intentions.
Discerning and determining one’s true intentionality in life is essential to the ability to freely assert one’s will constructively or creatively in the world; that is, if one chooses to do so. This is one of the fundamental goals in contemporary existential therapy. As Rollo May (1969) writes, psychotherapy “ought to be the place par excellence of experiencing intentions and their implied actions and meaning … without the patient having to transform this into overt behavior.” In other words, patients need the opportunity to explore, experience, and verbally express both their conscious intentions and unconscious intentionality within the comparatively safe therapeutic container and within what May (1969) calls the “structure of consciousness,” rather than reflexively acting them out in the world. Discerning one’s deeper intentionality or will in any given situation is a prerequisite to eventually determining what to do with it in outer reality.
“The road to hell is paved with good intentions.”
What is the psychological significance of this saying? While our conscious intentions typically are direct expressions of the ego or persona, our intentionality includes the primitive or primal desires, impulsions, urges, needs, or wishes of what Freud (1950) called the id; what Jung (1961) called the shadow; or what May (1969) called the daimonic (Diamond, 1996), and what can be generally conceptualized as the “unconscious.”
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Our intentionality sometimes initially appears as counter-will, as resistance or opposition to our conscious intentions. We want to say yes to something or someone, yet we say no instead. We intend to act one way, but behave in another. Cognition is overruled by emotion. Or vice versa. Our “inner child” complex is in conflict with the adult self. We find ourselves doing the polar opposite of what we consciously and conscientiously say, think, or feel we want to, often with disastrous consequences. Then, we scratch our heads wondering what just happened.
It is an extremely confusing, frustrating, and humbling experience. But it brings the beginning of psychological wisdom. We are forced to acknowledge that we are not the master in our own house; there are powerful forces at work within us that transcend and trump our conscious intentions. There is still much to learn about ourselves. We are far more complicated and complex creatures than we ever thought.
Exercising the Will of the Whole Person
Human will, while innate, must be discovered, discerned, refined, and then, like a muscle, creatively exercised. For Rank, neurosis, counter-will, or lack of what we call willpower, is the consequence of not being able to know, accept, and direct one’s will constructively and consistently.
To discern one’s intentionality is to experience and discover what one truly wants, rather than what one thinks one wants, feels one wants, or even wants to want. It refers to the will of the whole person. Intentionality underpins, and frequently undermines, conscious intention because it taps into the inherent, holistic, organic, instinctual wisdom within, including that of the unconscious and the body.
Whatever our true intentions and intentionality may be, even when they seem antithetical to who we believe ourselves to be, we need to acknowledge and accept them as part of ourselves. And try to reconcile them as best we can. Discerning and discovering our intentionality demands both courage and integrity. Integrity can be understood as unity of the personality. It implies being brutally honest with ourselves about both our intentions and intentionality; what motivates us, and what that says about who we truly are. This is never an easy and not always pleasant pursuit. But it can provide us with a capacity to accomplish things that simple willpower never could.
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